Online Exclusive | The imperative of compassion

As thanksgiving passes and we enter the holiday season, our society shifts the lens from reflection on how the world has been kind to us, to a focus on comfort, compassion and charity of Christmas. With the beginning of the December holiday season, black Friday shoppers were greeted with gift shopping bargains, the promise of Christmas comfort and the ringing of Salvation Army bells at every storefront.  The anticipation of holiday comforts summons the goodwill to give, supported by the tradition and self-satisfaction of giving one's hard earned money or time. People give money on their way in and out of stores, get into their cares and drive home, eager for the comforts of home, family and holiday traditions. But is this really enough? The action of giving itself is, of course, good action, but does it truly fulfill a complete understanding of charity? Of compassion? Are both these values only fulfilled as the habit of tradition or perhaps simple impulse of goodwill? Could it be possible that they are only for the pursuit of guiltless holiday comfort or something more?

It seems we have developed a culture of comfort for comfort's sake. We have created countless forms of recreation to help us relax, along with soft, warm chairs and couches to sit in as we watch them. Hot chocolate is as easy as hot water and ripping open a paper bag, a cold house is easily solved by turning a dial. We have iPods and electronics that the comforts of home can be carried with us. If all this doesn't work, we even have drugs to maintain an air of ease and comfort. Despite these daily relief balms, we still have reserved a special season in which comfort is an intrinsic value. How could this be if day to day we are surrounded by countless things to keep us comfortable? Perhaps, it is because there is a slight confusion in the way we understand comfort.

During the holiday season, the kind of comfort we experience is not just physical alleviation or mental distraction but rather deeper, more intrinsic comfort. It is the feeling that, no matter what has occurred during the year, we can be accepted and loved among family and friends. Despite mistakes and pain we have caused, we are assured that we are accepted and loved for who we are by those around us. Thus, we give gifts as a tangible reminder that we can love a person unconditionally while putting aside the events of the year.

How does this relate to charity and compassion? Clearly, this kind of love is compassionate, but it would seem to shortchange charity if its value only extended as far as some change falling into a metal can. Rather, the comfort we feel in the sphere of those who are compassionate to us, despite our faults, must be extended beyond the in-group of family and friends to the wider world through charity. Though charity can be something as simple as the act of giving money, charity which seeks compassion and universal comfort as an end holds relationships with "the stranger" as the center of action. Thus a reciprocal relationship is formed in which one person is given relief and the other has the opportunity to grow. It is in the personal connection that compassion can develop, and the comfort of human acceptance and understanding can be passed along.

It is easy to shirk from this daunting step for anonymously giving money is still good action and does not involve the same emotional commitment.  Actually encountering people in need, both physically and spiritually can be heartbreaking and overwhelming. It is uncomfortable because desperation and suffering tap into primal fears in us all, but if one hopes to grow through charity it must be done through these personal connections. One must be willing to step out of their comfort zone just as one can be assured that there is the same solace and understanding waiting from family and friends, which they have sought to spread through their own charity. One must be willing to break their heart on the suffering of that in need so that when they put the pieces back together, the compassion they felt will forever be a part of their heart.