Coming out against excessive celebration

To Whom It May Concern: I am a lesbian. Obviously it is unclear who I am, because unfortunately, I cannot live a completely ���out��� life. The culture of this campus as well as our greater society, both national and global, has made it a challenge for anyone to safely come out as anything other than heterosexual. Reading Ms. Galassi���s opinion piece reminded me of the silence that I must bare on a daily basis. It also reminded me of the lessons that our community���s so called allys need to hear. Although Galassi���s intentions may have been coming from what she presumes to be a supportive perspective, I felt offended by her sentinements as someone who is an active and educated member of the LGBTQQIAA community. Specifically, Ms. Galassi���s word choices reflected her ignorance. In describing the scene of National Coming Out Day, Galassi mentioned how she ���noticed a community that normally feels judged and discriminated against������ I am unsure if Ms. Galassi is an active or open part of the LGBTQQIAA community, but the fact is that such a group is normally judged and discriminated against. It is not a feeling, it is a fact. Our society is heteronormative by nature, meaning that being straight is the norm and therefore it is the sole sexual orientation that our society caters to. For instance, the lack of gender neutral bathrooms on our campus blatantly ignores the possibility of someone who is transgendered possibly desiring to attend this school. The same way that a building that does not have wheelchair access discriminates against the physically disabled and ���rewards��� the majority of people who are physically abled, so does our society ���reward��� those who���s sexual orientation complies with the norms (ie. they identify as straight). To claim then, that the LGBTQQIAA community merely ���feels��� discriminated against magnifies how Ms. Galassi must not understand that it goes beyond actual feeling. Discrimination against our community is manifest. Galassi then noted how she felt pride for our university, mentioning how she is a practicing Catholic who understands the ���conflict and debate over the issue of anyone that does not identify as purely heterosexual��� She noted that she also is ���aware of our belief that every person should be treated with dignity and respect.��� This would have been a lovely conclusion until she decided to raise questions that only someone foolishly grasping for an immediate utopia would ask. Galassi began on how the event angered her enough to wonder, ���Why do we need to celebrate people coming out?��� Perhaps Galassi does not have a friend who has come out to her, or has not experienced this process first hand to understand the magnitude of coming out. Whatever the case is���coming out can be a paradox of emotions. It is can be scary and risky, yet exhilarating and thrilling. It is certainly challenging to do and yet sometimes easy. It can be a monumental moment in someone���s life and, at the same time, it may prove to be anti-climatic. It can be all of those things at once. I personally believe that coming out, above all else, is brave. It is brave to come out in the face of a heteronormative culture. It is brave to risk friendships and ties with family to freely be yourself. It is brave to be open to a world where, in some parts, being gay is a crime punishable by death. It is brave to walk the halls of a conservative campus and wear LGBTQQIAA paraphanila knowing the stares, the judgements, and even the whispers that will come your way. I do know that in my ongoing coming out process, I have always felt a need to celebrate the milestone of coming out, despite all of the hardship. Galassi ultimately proved herself to not be an ally to me once she inquired, ���Why do we give the LGBT community more attention than other groups and create so much controversy?��� This is a problematic statement on multiple levels. First off���who is the ���we��� that gives the LGBT community attention? In a world where being gay can be a ���crime���, a nation where marriage equality is still an issue, and a campus where transgendered individuals aren���t recognized, I am wondering who is the ���we��� that gives the LGBT community so much attention. What is more offensive about this statement is the assertion that the LGBT community receives more attention than other groups. Childishly complaining about that the amount of attention the LGBT community receives, Galassi sounded as if she was desiring attention for a more pertinent group on our campus. What she may not have realized in saying that the LGBT community receives more attention than other groups is that she is implying that the LGBTQQIAA community has majority power and majority status. This group of people, which extends beyond the group that was seen in front of Crosby on October 11th certainly does not have majority status. Perhaps it is because it is LGBT History Month and one feels like there are plenty of...

As an ally, I am a little shocked by this piece. I don't understand how you can say that you felt pride for our school but then go on to say something as ignorant as, "Why do we need to celebrate people coming out?" Clearly, you do not have friends who identify as LGBT. It's pretty contradictory if you ask me. Although I identify as straight, some of the people I hold closest to my heart are not. It is heartbreaking to know that they sometimes have to live a lie in order to be accepted by people, or worse, entrust so-called friends with their identity, who in turn shun them, for whatever reason they choose. It saddens me beyond measure that members of this community have in many cases been tormented to the point of isolation, self-injury and suicide. Take the recent attacks in Spokane, for example. It is not a secret that these HUMAN BEINGS do not have it easy. To say that they are not worthy of a single day to celebrate who they are is disgusting. Like I said, I am straight, but I still feel that these individuals are more than deserving of this day. They have a much harder lifestyle than straight people do, and are denied some basic human rights such as marriage, and up until recently, fighting for their country. Why don't we just pretend they don't exist? This is not just a phase, or something that will go away. This day is 100% needed. I think that this is a great day for the community. It is a national celebration. Not just something that the "LGBT club" puts on, which by the way, is actually known as HERO at Gonzaga. Coming out is by no means an easy process, and I know this from watching people I am close to deal with it. People from acquaintances to family members can be so cruel and unsympathetic to this sometimes painful process, and to wish away this special day and essentially deny these people the right to celebrate who they are is unsettling.