In defense of scrubs

Thanks be to Fortuna I was not drinking a cup of coffee from the Crosby Café when I was reading the Bulletin — not because I do not like the delicious nectar, but because I would have spewed it all over the newspaper as I read Allison Whitener's scathing article.

Ms. Whitener reprimands guys — she later demeans the other half further by relegating the gender to "boys" — for an apparent lack of concern with regard to clothing, apparel and style. Is this anything new?

Yes, the majority of men do not have concern for clothing or style. If this were to change, if men were to spend hours in front of the mirror and several more in front of the closet, then I could submit an article to the Bulletin titled, "The Final Nail in the Coffin: An End to the American Republic." After a digression about our economic and political decline, I could conclude with a sorrowful account of a feminine-encouraged wave of self-conscious doubt descending upon young American men across the nation.

Clothing and style is not our selling point. I would rather like to think gentlemanly manners — chivalry if you will — charisma, strength, charm, honor and a concern for family stand head and shoulders above Brooks Brothers and Lisa Kline Men — let's not forget Hanes! Peel back the obstructive layer of uncleanliness, ladies. You might be surprised what you find underneath (sexual innuendo not intended).

I see a concern for one's look as an indulgence in insecurity at its best and a fear of one's supposed inferior status at worst. Contrast that to a typical male's nonchalance and acceptance of his attire as it is. Why such a virtue is rather Taoist — truly, the sentiments from the Tao Te Ching, "A great tailor cuts little" and "a contented man is never disappointed," come to mind. The ideal man should have gentlemanly qualities. He should be courteous to women and fair to men while maintaining the sage-like calm of none other than the "Big Lebowski."

I concede that there should be limits. Truly, wearing slippers to a party, as Ms. Whitener described one man, is rather extreme (unless this was a party-hard and get-drunk party. In that case, the attire suits the atmosphere perfectly). It depends on the occasion. Without a doubt, a wedding, funeral, job interview or some other important event requires a greater exercise over one's attire than daily life. If it comes to just strolling the sidewalks of Gonzaga University or Spokane though, then "sweats and a free Gonzaga T-shirt" are acceptable in my book. Grow a thick beard while you're at it, Sons of Mars (I've seen worse at the Plaza).

I would like to conclude with the hope that those of the female persuasion find joy in casual clothing, peace in the status quo and security with the knowledge that when the moment is at hand, men will make a good impression with clothing that will make you smile with pride. In the meantime, you will excuse me while I tie the shoelaces of my running shoes, put on my T-shirt and slip into my athletic shorts — I have to pump some iron at the gym.